The Purple Anxiety

So many faces but I chose to be yours. I chose to be your "the one".    I chose you over everyone. I chose to invest in you. I chose to be with you. Your one smile lights up my day like someone has offered me the best of both worlds. You did not know how important your one call or text was to me. You were my place. I wish I could say the same. Deep down there was a feeling for you which was new, What I didn't know, we would end up like this because this time I didn't choose you over everyone else. If life was easy, we might have chosen each other again but who are we to blame. You were my day and night. Waiting for you all day long made me want you more and more. Now, when you are gone you are my muse for all the art I create. I know we will meet again but at some other time and space. We belong to each other and we will always remain the same.

Someone recently asked me “How do I unlove a person” and my first reaction was how can you even think of that, it's a myth. When you invest your energy or time on someone, you leave a part of you with them, forever! My close friend is struggling to leave a relationship in which she has invested 9 years of her life. She is highly attached to him and cannot let go of him at any cost because she thinks of her invested time, energy and emotions which were completely in loss. She knew for years that she wouldn't be happy with him but planning to marry him real soon because she accepted her suffering. When I talk to her, I completely understand where she is coming from, people pass judgements and suggestions but she feels helpless due to many psychological factors. No one is here to blame, not even the guy but the SELF. There are instances in life where you do accept or normalise certain circumstances of life which are toxic for any healthy human being. Both of them are not happy,

  Attachment is inevitable for humans because we tend to care and react to our emotions quite often. We are prone to fall back due to our ability to feel strong emotions for things that are close to us in life. People like me are insecure about their existence and then they try to look for someone who can fulfill them, we fail. We all are coming from somewhere and heading somewhere with all the experiences we have had once, we are the product of our past. We learned things from our childhood and how we are being treated by our caregivers defines us today. Not entirely but a part of it says a lot about our current personality. With the kind of attachment we had with our caregivers/parents, there is a possibility that it defines our ongoing relationship with people in general.  If I talk about my childhood, it was a normal healthy childhood according to my parents, where they pamper their first kid a lot, offer everything they ever craved for and when it comes to being strict they scar

Basic mantra: Everything is constantly changing. Nothing is constant. The moment you realize that nothing is constant in your life and every bit of second, each one of us evolving would give you a lot of positive perspective towards life. But again it would require your constant awareness and understanding. You will be detached and detachment would bring negligible exceptions. Always remember that only you can help yourself. No one else can come and bring you out of flashes of unhappiness or depression. Starting over is always a choice. Only you are responsible for them and only you can decide when to start again. & Forgive and Let it go. Learn to forgive and let it go, because starting over needs a lot of forgiveness and courage to let go of people and things which do not serve your soul. Forgiveness would make you mature and the art of letting go would test your resilience at different stages of life. Letting go and forgiveness would nurture you in a way that you will